While working reception at the gym, I had the pleasure of dealing with a member we affectionately called “Little Miss Impossible” due to her daily stream of unrealistic requests. One day, she marched up to the desk with an air of urgency.
Member: “I’m trying to work out, and there are too many geese!”
I looked around, confused, trying to spot any geese within the gym. There were none in sight.
Me: “Geese?”
Member: “No, you idiot! Not in here! Outside! There are too many geese outside!”
Me: “By the lake next to the gym?”
Member: “Obviously! They’re honking and messing up my rhythm. I can see them all through the big window, and they’re ugly!”
Me: “And what exactly do you want me to do about it?”
Member: “Move them along!”
Trying to hold back laughter at the absurd mental image of me chasing geese, I responded:
Me: “Ma’am, they live by the lake. They’re not loitering. I can’t just move them along.”
Member: “They should’ve all flown south by now! Go and tell them it’s winter!”
Me: “I can’t do that, ma’am.”
Member: “Then I’ll be informing corporate of your laziness!”
Me: “Oh, please do! That would be amazing!”
Sure enough, she reported the issue to corporate, and the entire gym chain was soon in stitches. “Move the geese along” quickly became a joke among the staff whenever a task felt particularly difficult. It’s not every day you get asked to relocate wildlife for a gym member!
